Because your happiness is what you make of it.
I’m still not sure if it had anything to do with turning 30 or just being fed up with my own bullshit. Now that I think about it, it was probably both. I can’t remember the exact day, but one day I just decided that .. I wanted to do better. I wanted to be better, I wanted to be happy on my own.
I lived in worry for so long , and thought the only thing that made me happy was alcohol and edibles at one point. It wasn’t the life I wanted to live, but I somehow was living it.
Life is what we make of it. You can either allow life to control you or you can make the best out of it in every small way possible. What I’ve learned is, life doesn’t have to be what it is right now. You can always change it with the habits and intentions you put forth each day.
Here are the 7 bad habits I changed and never looked back on. My hope is that it will inspire you to get your shit in order…
Overthinking: It’s a process that takes time to really stop, but every time you acknowledge it is a step towards releasing it.
Letting go of people I felt didn’t have the best intentions for me. We often tie history to the reason why we tolerate a lot of jealously, hate, or just toxic behavior from others. History means nothing when the intentions don’t mean well. Instead of trying to change people simply take their access to you away. It’s ok to put your peace of mind, first.
Waking up and going straight to work: I’ll need 2 hours of me-time, first, please. I’m selfish in the morning, but giving myself that time to do WHATEVER I want has eased my anxiety and helped improve my mood. This doesn’t mean sit in the bed and sulk. In my me-time I do proactive activities that bring me a sense of grounding ie. reading, meditation, working out, taking a bath, writing, making breakfast.
Giving yourself a little more time in the morning makes such a big difference. When I think back to when I worked at a 9-5 I was miserable!
I was just waking up, going to work, going home, and repeat. It sounds miserable as I’m typing it out.
Don’t believe me test it out. Put on your big girl panties and wake up an hour earlier. Do that 1 thing you wish you had time to do.
Saying “YES” when I really want to say NO. I use to say YES a lot. Mainly, to make other people feel good and to not cancel plans. But what I’ve learned is, you have to listen to yourself. If your gut is telling you “I don’t wanna do this,” then don’t. There’s nothing wrong with staying in the house or doing something else that you really want to do. Why ruin your day doing something you really don’t want to do? … It doesn’t make sense.
Looking for validation. I’m very indecisive. I hate to admit it, but I can’t hide from my truth. I use to look for validation in everything I did always asking my close ones, is this good, should I, is he cute, what if I? I found myself seeking validation and doing exactly what I did not want to do. It made no sense. Instead of seeking validation I learned to trust myself and my decision-making more. It doesn’t matter how others might feel if it’s for your greater good. After I stopped seeking validation I started to enjoy life so much more.
Listening to trap music in the early morning. If you know me you know I’m the Trap Queen. I’ll spit a verse from Gucci Mane any day.
“Music has the ability to evoke powerful emotional responses.”
Trap music evokes hostility, hype, anger, frustration, drugs.
This explains were a lot of my anger came from. I was literally pumping myself with it every morning to start my day. Don’t get me wrong I still love my trap music, just not in the mornings.
I switched up my playlist to afro-beats, lo-fi beats, or sounds of Maseago. I can officially say, it changed my perspective of the mornings. Now I’m more at peace. Now I’m happier. Now I have the energy to go on throughout the day. What you feed yourself sets the tone of your day and that doesn’t always mean food.
Happiness isn’t textbook knowledge it’s found in doing what’s best for you. Sometimes you just have to sit in the mirror and ask yourself … WTF is best for me?
xox Black Daria